October 24, 2009

Psalm 139: 3, 6: "You are familiar with all my ways. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me."

Camp Truth VIII two weekends ago was such a blessing. I was reunited with everything I have had but neglected for so long: silence, prayer, tears of joy, strength, and God's truly unconditional love. When I told Father Pierre about my anger as of late, he told me to read Psalm 139. To read and confirm that God is "familiar with all my ways" is amazing... no doubt it's such an infinite act of love to grasp, but so comforting at the same time.
I don't mean to make this sound like a huge thing, but I was reminded of that saving comfort when God saved our lives three days after I came back form the camp. As our car somehow slipped and swerved about 180 degrees in the merging lane, all I could say and think was "oh my God" over and over. I was angry again because no one stopped to be witnesses or help out. But sometimes, I'm the one who has to stop myself and rethink what I just thought, and make it better and positive. I'm the one who needs to trust and believe that everything will be okay despite the inevitable. And if I wait, something good will surprise me. This near-accident showed me that I need to have faith in order to be saved, and a consistent one to spare me from harm even a meter's distance away from the light post. It was scary and something I've never experienced before. But when I waited, a highway guy, accident response, fire truck, ambulance, and police came: all because someone was sincere enough to call 911 but probably had to be somewhere and continued to merge onto the highway.
I'm calmer now - I'm even listening to calmer music haha - but I still think I need some minor form of anger management! Pause the music in the sidebar and listen to these:

This guy just turned my age (19)!!!

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